Mainstream media gets desperate for views, shares, and likes

News can be informative, debatable or even politically motivated. However, a new category of news has recently emerged, and we have decided to call it: News so dumb we want to collapse on the floor in utter shock.

We already have three news pieces jostling to be part of this illustrious category on this fine Wednesday (11 February). Not a bad start indeed.

1. “Using mobile phones while walking is dangerous but people continue doing so”

This was the headline from our trusty media friend, The Straits Times.


It’s not news if it’s “duh’. We can easily think of three other “dangerous” things that “people continue doing” from the top of our heads.

Drinking water: because we could choke from that accidental over-excited swallow any moment.

Walking: because we could trip, fall, and sustain a deadly wound infection.

Peeing: because a poisonous snake could rise up from the depths of the toilet bowl water and bite our butt.


2. “No litter, seniors leave dinner venue spick and span”

This headline graced AsiaOne, a sub-company of media mogul Singapore Press Holdings (SPH), and MyPaper as well.


We’re betting (even though online betting is now illegal) that this is in response to PM Lee’s angry post about the litter at the recent Laneway Music Festival. Media outlets are trying to pacify angry PM Lee, whilst secretly imploring fellow Singaporeans not to litter.

But really? Featuring such things as news?

Maybe “Girl, 18, lauded for throwing a broken pencil into the rubbish bin at home” will be splashed across the headlines tomorrow.

We sure hope “news” is never degraded to that level.

3. “Queues at Changi Road shop selling pineapple bak kwa”

Another farce by our media buddy The Straits Times.


Three things we want to point out from this article:

Firstly, Jalelah Abu Baker is not just some intern roped in to mass produce articles that may be mildly interesting to the public. She’s a full-fledged news reporter, and The Straits Times wastes her experience and ability on a news article about pineapple bak kwas. 


Secondly, Jalelah Abu Baker sounds terribly like a Muslim name, and Muslims don’t eat pork. So why is she writing about the pork delicacy bak kwa?


Lastly, why is The Straits Times even writing about this?


The Straits Times: Authoritative provider of all things bak kwa.


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Featured Image via Current Affairs 2015, Nanoveu
With reference to The Straits Times, AsiaOne, The Straits Times