Swimming In The Strait
Malaysia and Singapore are close, but not that close. So much so that swimming over from Johor Baru to Woodlands would be arduous, but not impossible if you’re a good swimmer.
Thus, 4 Bangladeshi men tried their luck and tested their athleticism. The four, aged between 25 and 42, were arrested on Tuesday (March 14) by the Police Coastal Guard (PCG) for attempting to swim across the Strait of Johor to enter Singapore illegally, reported The Straits Times.
What drove them to do it? What did they want to enter Singapore to do? We can only speculate here:
1. Watch Beauty And The Beast
The long-awaited Disney blockbuster Beauty And The Beast won’t be shown in Malaysia, amid controversy over a so-called “gay moment” in the film. Read our story about how a gay man wrote the lyrics for the movie’s songs.
Censors wanted to cut 4.5 minutes of the show due to this, but Disney refused and pulled the movie entirely from release.
Perhaps these poor deprived chaps just couldn’t wait to download the movie online or buy pirated DVDs of the show, as they do across the Causeway.
They wanted to see Belle on the big screen, dammit!
Sadly, after their arrest, it’ll probably be quite some time before they’ll be able to watch the film.
2. Win Olympic Gold
It’s quite unbelievable to realise that Malaysia has never won an Olympic Gold medal in its history.
The closest they have come is a few silver medals for badminton.
As for Singapore, well only two words need to be said: Joseph Schooling.
Since the 4 Bangladeshis are such good swimmers, they undoubtedly had aspirations to also win a medal for swimming — and everybody in Singapore, JB and some say Batam knows that Singapore boasts a proven medal winner in swimming.
Since there were 4 of them, perhaps they wanted to go one better than Schooling and get a medal in the team relay event too.
They must’ve got the shock of their lives to find themselves arrested simply for using the ocean as a training ground. Don’t feel dejected guys, just keep swimming.
3. Buy Kong Hee’s Oil
Despite being sentenced to eight years’ jail for misappropriating $24 million in church funds, Kong Hee, the pastor of City Harvest Church whom God apologised to, has not let that detract him from carrying out God’s will.
The soon-to-be jailbird has been busy producing God’s anointed olive oil. His oil has proven so popular that it had at one point been sold over Carousell.
Kong Hee’s name has travelled far and wide, and had obviously reached the 4 Bangladeshis, who just had to lay their hands on a bottle that could “cast out many demons” and heal diseases from head to toe.
Don’t feel sad for them — after their arrest, they just might meet up with Kong Hee in prison and get more than just anointing.
4. Enter Yishun Before The Wall Is Built
Forget the Marina Bay Sands and Gardens by the Bay — any visitor who wants a feel of the true gritty Singapore needs to pay a visit to Yishun.
In a way, living in Yishun is like going for a roller-coaster ride — it’s your go-to place for anything thrilling, creepy and fun.
It seems like the town’s fame has been spreading far and wide, so much so that these 4 Bangladeshi men rushed over to Singapore upon hearing our suggestion that a wall around Yishun should be built to make Singapore great again.
Or they heard about how great a place Yishun is, and wanted to live in Yishun for a lifetime of adventure. Read our story about how the Yishun wall could keep the good in.
Well, the 4 guys managed to find a wall indeed — those of a jail cell.
5. Avoid The Reciprocal Road Charge
It costs a lot to enter Singapore the traditional way now, after a Reciprocal Road Charge (RPC) of $6.40 was implemented on Feb 15 by the Land Transport Authority (LTA) for foreign-registered cars entering via the Tuas or Woodlands Checkpoint.
Everything also pay and pay. So in order to avoid paying the outrageous toll, the Bangladeshi men decided to swim rather than drive across the Causeway.
They may have been caught but hey — at least they saved $6.40.
6. Escape Potential North Korean Attack
The perplexing murder of Kim Jong Nam, the half-brother of the current North Korean leader, has strained diplomatic ties between Malaysia and North Korea.
Both countries have expelled their ambassadors and held each other’s citizens hostage.
Things seem to escalating too, with Malaysian Defence Minister Hishammuddin Hussein calling on allies to help in the event of a war with North Korea.
The 4 Bangladeshi men might have packed their bags and set for Singapore in order to avoid being obliterated by nuclear missiles.
But wait, if Malaysia were to count on its allies, then wouldn’t Singapore be involved in the skirmish too?
Uh oh, it appears there may have been a miscalculation in their escape plans…
Keeping Singapore Safe
In all seriousness, we have no clue as to why these men tried to swim to Singapore as investigations are still ongoing.
Nonetheless, we would like to commend the PCG team for their vigilance and commitment in keeping the shores of Singapore safe.