Humour

5 Bridges For Mahathir Because Crooked Bridges Are Too Basic

Dr Mahathir’s Crooked Bridge

If you haven’t heard, Dr Mahathir wants a crooked bridge linking Singapore to Malaysia. The bridge will replace the current one between Woodlands and Johor Baru.

According to the 93-year-old Prime Minister, the crooked bridge will ease traffic congestion, improve the marine environment and facilitate maritime activities.

In response, Singapore said it saw “no significant benefits” to the bridge.

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It sounds like Singapore isn’t fully convinced of Dr Mahathir’s crooked bridge idea. So we thought we’d give him a few ideas.

Below, we pick out some bridges which Dr Mahathir can take inspiration from and hopefully impress Singapore more than he did with the crooked bridge.

1. Eshima Ohashi, Japan

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A portion of the Eshima Ohashi bridge may look like a near-vertical drop, but it really isn’t. It’s just the way the picture was taken.

But the idea here is for Dr Mahathir to suggest a bridge that features a steep downward slope at both ends. The drop will be steep enough such that cars won’t be able to slow down. This will certainly help ease traffic congestion as Dr Mahathir had hoped to do with the crooked bridge.

2. Lego-Brücke, Germany

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There is a bridge in Germany that, while made of concrete, is painted to look like pieces of Lego fixed together.

Such a bridge will be a perfect advertisement for Legoland Malaysia. Unfortunately, this only benefits Malaysia, and not so much Singapore. So Dr Mahathir will probably have to talk about how the colorful Lego bricks can lighten the moods of drivers stuck in a jam. It will be like SMRT’s playing music in stations to soothe commuters.

3. Nanpu Bridge, China

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Yeah, we don’t really know what’s going on there either. But we have idea for Dr Mahathir. He can propose a bridge that looks like Nanpu Bridge — just make sure it has lots of loops — and invite Singapore to install ERP gantries at various intervals. This way, it will be a win-win for both parties.

4. The Rolling Bridge, London

This ‘curling’ bridge is actually made for pedestrians. Still, we thought it could serve as inspiration for Dr Mahathir — that is, to build a kind of retractable bridge which he can retract whenever he’s unhappy with Singapore and doesn’t want Singaporeans coming into Malaysia.

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5. Moses Bridge, Netherlands

The Moses Bridge isn’t meant for cars either, but nonetheless gives a good idea for a bridge. Just as Moses parted the Red Sea, the Moses Bridge ‘parts’ a little lake in Netherlands.

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Dr Mahathir can suggest a bridge that runs right through the water, just like the Moses Bridge. So when the water level rises and the bridge floods, everyone will know that they have not been doing their part to fight climate change.

By showing his commitment to fight climate change, it will be hard for Singapore to turn down his proposal.

Featured image from Niindo.com and Piximus.

Russell CHAN

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