Remains Of Woman’s Father Wrongly Handed To Another Family, NEA Apologises For ‘Serious Lapse’

Remains Of Woman’s Cremated Father Wrongly Handed To Another Family

A woman whose father passed away found out that his cremated remains were handed over to the wrong next-of-kin when they were at Mandai Ash Collection Centre.

This triggered a rush to retrieve their ashes from the other family, who had luckily chosen to place their loved one’s ashes in an urn.

However, even after retrieving the correct remains, the woman’s family was forced to complete their funeral rites in a rush due to the mix-up and delays as the columbarium was closing.

Compounded with the grief of losing a loved one, they had to handle the issues with little help from the agency that caused the mix-up.

Ms Tan, who spoke to MS News, said, unfortunately, she’ll always be reminded of this incident every year when she visits her father’s ashes.

She says she doesn’t want what happened to her family to happen to anyone else, and hopes to raise awareness.

Informed by funeral service provider that remains of father were wrongly given to another family

Ms Tan, who’s 41 and works in the healthcare industry, said her father passed away on 4 Aug.

On 8 Aug, Ms Tan’s family was at Mandai Ash Collection Centre to collect his ashes to place in his urn and store at the columbarium.

The first sign that something was wrong was when the family’s queue number was not called despite waiting for a good while.

When Ms Tan’s brother tried to go over to the counter to ask when their turn would arrive, the staff allegedly replied in a hostile manner that if the queue number wasn’t called, he should take a seat first.

Only later did they find out a staff member had mistakenly handed their father’s remains to another family altogether.

However, Ms Tan said she found out about this not through the staff but through their funeral service provider, who was with them at the time.

“They didn’t have the decency to inform us personally even though we were sitting in front of the counter,” she said.

Had to retrieve remains of father from other family

Upon hearing about the mix-up, Ms Tan and her family panicked. They were concerned that the other family may have performed another ritual, like ashes scattering or sea burial.

“If it’s going to be a sea burial, or ashes scattering, then there’s no way we’re gonna be able to retrieve the ashes,” Ms Tan said.

Fortunately, the other family had opted to place the remains in an urn.

However, Ms Tan’s family would have to head to another block at Mandai Columbarium to collect their father’s remains.

That location was where the other family had set up their altar to perform their rites, and Ms Tan’s father’s remains were already in the other family’s urn.

Additionally, Ms Tan found coins inside, which were used as part of a ritual.

It was not the way anyone would have wished to go through their last moments with their loved ones.

“That’s probably the last time I’m going to have contact with my dad,” she lamented.

During this time, Ms Tan said the National Environment Agency (NEA) did not do much except contact the other family and tell them of the situation.

“The officers didn’t follow us to the columbarium,” she said.

Rushed through funeral rites due to closing time

Ms Tan said she was supposed to collect her father’s ashes at 2.45pm. However, the mix-up and subsequent travel time meant her family could only start their rites at 5.20pm.

This was 10 minutes before Mandai Columbarium would close for the day.

The collection was also delayed by an hour and a half.

Ms Tan said the family decided to proceed with the rites the same day because the funeral service provider was already on hand, and they didn’t want to delay things any longer.

However, the family was in a rush as it was a Chinese custom to cremate loved ones during day time.

Additionally, a contractor allegedly told them they’d have to finish their rites by 5.30pm.

Not only was the area already in use by another family, but Ms Tan said there was also a lack of privacy to mourn the loss of their father.

In the end, the family had to rush through their last rites, adding to the grief and trauma they already experienced.

They even had to lock the facility themselves as it was already past 6pm.

NEA met with family & offered formal apology

Following the debacle, the family lodged a formal complaint with NEA, which manages the columbarium and ash collection centre.

On 11 Aug, NEA met with the family to explain the circumstances around the cremated remains mix-up.

They also issued a formal apology and said they’d implemented measures to prevent such things. However, Ms Tan said there were no attempts at service recovery.

Given the circumstances, she thought the agency lacked empathy and know-how in handling the situation.

There was also seemingly a lack of communication from when the mix-up occurred, Ms Tan felt.

Even the way the contractor told them to vacate the columbarium facility after 5.30pm was also troubling.

However, Ms Tan did note that NEA said they have disciplined the staff involved in the mix-up. She also hopes the measures will prevent such things from happening to others.

This incident was very traumatic . . . everyone is already down when collecting their loved one’s remains, so we don’t want these things to add to their grief and sadness.

NEA apologises for “serious lapse”

In response to media queries by MS News, an NEA spokesperson admitted that the remains of Ms Tan’s father were erroneously released to the wrong family.

The mistake was discovered around 10 minutes later, and the remains were returned to the family.

“This is a serious lapse,” the spokesperson noted. “Our investigation found that the officer involved did not follow the required protocol for the release of cremated remains.”

The spokesperson added that NEA has put in place additional safeguards to avoid the recurrence of such incidents.

NEA has also taken disciplinary action against the errant officer. “Our officers at the Ash Collection Centre should also have handled the situation better.”

The spokesperson said NEA has apologised to the families concerned, and will provide them with their fullest support during this difficult period.

Also read: Cremated Man’s Family Sues Funeral Services For S$225,000, Received Wrong Rites After Mix-Up

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