Many of us may have grown up, never having to wonder if we are biologically related to our parents.
For local blogger and YouTuber Naomi Neo, it turns out that she had thought about this on and off since she was a kid.
Now 26, Naomi recently learned that she was adopted and uploaded a now-viral video featuring a Q&A session with her adopted parents. The video was uploaded on the influencer’s 26th birthday, i.e. 25 Jan.
Despite the bombshell revelation, Naomi said the revelation only brought her closer to her parents, and that family isn’t necessarily defined by blood.
In the video, Naomi’s parents shared that they turned to adoption after failing to conceive a child for 8 years following their marriage.
According to Naomi’s father, he and his wife were medically certified that they would not be able to bear kids of their own.
Seeing that his siblings had fathered a number of kids, Mr Neo was keen on raising one himself too.
During a family trip to China, Naomi’s family learned of a girl being put up for adoption in their ancestral hometown.
Holding back tears, Naomi’s parents recalled how she was wrapped in thick clothes as it was pretty cold at the time.
Naomi’s biological father and mother were apparently a barber and a teacher respectively. They, however, had to give Naomi up as they had more than 1 child, which was against China’s one-child policy at the time.
The adoption procedure was rather lengthy and required Naomi’s parents to prove “medically” that they were barren and that they were able to provide for her financially.
As Naomi arrived in Singapore, her parents recalled feeling bad for “literally taking (took) someone’s kid away from them” and needed some time before they could accept the fact.
Despite adopting Naomi, her parents shared that they’ve always treated her like their own flesh and blood.
Her mother, in particular, even shared that she forbade those around her from using the word “adopted”.
Mrs Neo said she intended to keep Naomi in the dark about her adoption “forever” as she was afraid that Naomi might “leave the house” when she learnt the truth.
While it’s impossible to predict how such disclosures might turn out, Naomi said learning about her adopted roots only brought her and her parents closer.
According to the 26-year-old, it allowed her to understand life and gave her fresh perspectives on matters.
While Naomi and her parents might not be biologically related, Naomi shared that the love and care she received taught her that “family isn’t necessarily defined by our blood”.
As the video drew to a close, Naomi thanked her parents for bringing her up over the years, despite her not being “a child of their (your) own”.
Naomi related that she first developed doubts about her ‘roots’ during a health checkup in her schooling days.
Apparently, her health booklet did not have any information about her blood type. It also stated that she was born in China rather than in Singapore.
When Naomi questioned her parents about the sus details, they gave differing answers from time to time.
Naomi also realised that she didn’t have any pictures of herself as an infant.
Though her mother claimed they left it at an “old home”, Naomi found it sus after having her own children—a mother would always cherish photos of their children when they’re young.
While pregnant with her first child, Naomi found it weird whenever her mother responded with fascination to matters about pregnancy, such as a baby’s kicks.
Naomi’s mother would also often share pregnancy advice from a 3rd party rather than personal ones.
One day, when Naomi phoned her parents separately to ask about her blood type, she received different information from both.
It was then that her parents realised that they could not hide the secret any longer.
Kudos to Naomi for her bravery in sharing an intimate and sensitive topic, one that’s close to her heart.
Hopefully, having an open conversation like this sends the message that it’s time we should destigmatise the taboo narrative surrounding adopted children.
After all, as Naomi so aptly puts it, family isn’t about who we share blood connections to, but rather those who showered us with love and stuck around through tough times.
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Featured image adapted from Naomi Neo on YouTube.
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