A recent open letter from a concerned mother to Mr Ong Ye Kung about a 2019 PSLE Math question caused quite a stir among Singaporeans.
While many, like her, were upset with the Ministry of Education (MOE) for setting such challenging questions, some tried to rationalise the situation.
One such parent was Ms Tjin Lee, who assigned responsibility to parents as well, in caring for children’s mental health.
The waterfall responses to the first mother’s open letter hinted at a widespread discontent with MOE’s decision.
Rather than add fuel to the fire, Ms Lee decided to take a more balanced approach.
In her Instagram post which garnered over 1,000 likes on Thursday (3 Oct), Ms Lee explained what parents can do to help their children overcome such challenges.
Acknowledging that some of the PSLE Math questions were difficult even for her, Ms Lee identifies with most parents’ concern.
However, she explained that parents shouldn’t panic, as it could have adverse effects on their children, who are “drawing on [their] fear and stress”.
Instead, parents should be kinder to their children and themselves, and not let the exam stress overwhelm them.
Appealing to parents who place much importance on grades, Ms Lee asks that they reassure their child that it’s just an exam.
Perhaps her most resonant reminder is that:
The exam won’t define your child, but your reaction and response to the grades, just might.
While society usually demands that they do well in order to succeed, children also need the right kind of motivation. So why not encourage them to learn from failure rather than feel hopeless because of it?
The quote Ms Lee shares from Dr Ong Lue Peng, the Head of Psychology at the Institute of Mental Health (IMH) aptly sums the situation up:
If a child loses some marks, he only fails an exam. If he loses his self-confidence, he will fail in life.
At the end of the day, exams are merely stepping stones to the next level. There are various paths for different individuals to succeed, so let’s not restrict ourselves to just one.
And if we or anyone we know trips at any stage, there’s no harm in trying again.
Featured image adapted from mummywee and Tjin Lee on Instagram.
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