Many Singaporean parents have a similar dream for their children: Study hard to get a degree and job that pays well so they can support their family.
Local actress Tan Kheng Hua, however, says her daughter hasn’t gotten a full-time job despite graduating early this year.
Instead of being worried or disappointed, though, Tan is proud of her — in fact, she encourages her to be this way.
Source: Tan Kheng Hua on Instagram
Why is that so? Read on to find out.
In an Instagram post on Friday (7 Oct), Tan said her daughter Shi-An, 24, “doesn’t exactly know what she wants to do”.
Not only does she not have a full-time job after graduation, but she doesn’t have a well-laid-out plan for marriage and getting her own place, either.
However, this doesn’t bother her at all, the 59-year-old veteran actress said, adding that,
It is exactly the sort of state I encourage her to be in at the moment.
In fact, she praised Shi-An as being everything her parents hoped she would grow up to be.
One reason Tan is so proud of her only child is that she isn’t “blindly following familiar Singapore paradigms for young university graduates”.
That presumably includes getting a good full-time job (i.e. well-paying and befitting one’s status as a graduate) and advancing steadily in your career. For women, that may also mean marrying a suitable husband and having children.
Instead, Shi-An is focusing on her passions — actively pursuing them, and discovering for herself their depths and validity, her proud mother said.
Source: Tan Kheng Hua on Instagram
That doesn’t mean she’s sponging off her parents, though — Tan revealed that her daughter has part-time gigs in a variety of fields.
The income she earns from them is apparently enough to allow her to enjoy the lifestyle she wants for herself.
Shi-An has followed her parents into acting — her father is actor Lim Yu-Beng — with a recent appearance on MeWatch in a serial named “Sephia”.
She also does freelance graphic design work, she told Her World in an interview.
Rather than be fixated on Shi-An’s job, Tan chose to point out her daughter’s positive character traits.
She described her as curious, resourceful, imaginative, responsible and loving, among other things.
Often, the measure of a good person is how they treat the people around them, and Shi-An also does well on that count.
She takes care of both her parents’ homes and entertains her grandparents consistently, according to Tan.
She’s also a great friend and “evolving partner”, as well as a doting “mother” to her furbaby Toastie.
Additionally, mother and daughter are obviously very close, as Shi-An confides in her when she feels anxious, lonely and uncertain.
Source: Tan Kheng Hua on Instagram
She’s also not afraid to speak her mind and give her opinions.
Tan shared that her daughter has helped her, too, as she allowed her to keep growing up and discovering herself and her life.
That’s why Tan said she’ll always be on Shi-An’s side cheering her on, and will be there if need be.
Source: Lim Shi-An on Instagram
The contented mother ended off by encouraging her daughter to fly and be free, self-sufficient, interested and engaged.
Tan’s pride in her daughter may strike some Singaporeans as odd and quite different from other Singaporean parents.
However, by caring more about her child’s personal qualities, she’s arguably letting her blossom into a person with more depth and character rather than someone mindlessly chasing the Singapore dream for the sake of it.
While some may not agree with that, the love that mother and daughter have for each other is clear, and perhaps that’s all that matters.
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Featured image adapted from Tan Kheng Hua on Instagram and Instagram.
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