When it comes to relationships, different people have different expectations.
The most important thing is for both parties to come to an understanding — and, if necessary, a compromise — on them if they wish to make things work.
Recently, a woman took to the anonymous confessions page NUSWhispers to seek the internet’s advice on a little conundrum of hers.
Source: NUSWhispers
She said she wanted her boyfriend to get her a designer handbag as an anniversary gift. However, he refused, saying he’d rather save up for a nice proposal ring.
They argued over this, and now the woman wants online strangers to tell her what they make of the situation.
The post went up on the NUSWhispers Facebook page on Sunday (28 May).
According to the OP, her boyfriend of seven years just graduated and is currently making around S$4,000 a month.
During the time they were dating, she claimed that she had “never once requested any big value gifts”.
The most expensive gift she had ever received from him was a ring and a bag, which cost about S$700.
Not too long ago, she spotted a bag from the Italian luxury brand Gucci and liked it so much that she asked her boyfriend to get it for her as an anniversary present.
Source: Christian Vierig/Getty Images via The Vintage Bar, for illustration purposes only
The designer item cost over S$2,000.
However, her boyfriend turned her down. He explained that he was saving up for a ring to propose to her with, which also cost a lot.
Source: Katelyn MacMillan on Unsplash, for illustration purposes only
The woman then told him that she’d accept a “normal ring” — one that’s less than S$1,000 — and to just get her the bag.
What’s more, the proposal ring will probably end up being “kept inside a drawer” as they will wear wedding bands after getting married.
Thus, in her mind, this was “a good deal” since her boyfriend won’t have to fork out too much money.
Alas, her boyfriend was not happy with her idea. At all.
He purportedly “flared up and raged” at the OP, saying he wants to save money and not blow it on a Gucci bag for her.
The boyfriend stressed that it was his money. Therefore, he gets to decide how he wants to spend it.
Taking it one step further, he told his girlfriend that if she wanted a branded bag so badly, she could leave him for someone else who was willing to get it for her.
“I know he is a little stingy with his money since the start, and up till now, we are still splitting for dates even though he will mostly let me pay [a] few dollars less,” the OP said. “But is this a red flag about his character?”
In fact, she doesn’t even believe that he is planning to buy her an expensive ring.
“Otherwise, he would be more than happy to take on my idea of getting the bag I like, and at the same time, he can save his money by spending less on the ring.”
Netizens were not afraid to tell the woman what they thought of her — which isn’t exactly flattering.
One user straight up said that if the OP’s boyfriend were their son, they’d tell him to break up with her.
Source: Facebook
They added that telling someone how to spend their money or thinking one has a right to their partner’s earnings is a huge turn-off.
Another told the OP that she is the red flag and that if she’s so desperate to own a Gucci and can afford it, she can very well buy it herself.
This user concurred, saying that the OP’s boyfriend should dump her for someone with a more mature attitude towards finances.
Source: Facebook
On the other side of the spectrum were folks who agreed that the boyfriend was “stingy” and that the OP should get her own bag and leave him.
Source: Facebook
Some said it might be better to end things before they get worse due to the couple’s clashing attitudes towards money.
Source: Facebook
In any case, we hope that the OP and her boyfriend can have a calm conversation about this and reach an amicable solution.
Ultimately, if a relationship ends over a designer handbag, then it probably wouldn’t have gone very far anyway.
Have news you must share? Get in touch with us via email at news@mustsharenews.com.
Featured image adapted from James Ree on Unsplash, for illustration purposes only.
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