'There are seasons in life': Netizens advise woman in S'pore who yearns for besties in her 30s

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Netizens give advice to woman in Singapore seeking close friendships in her 30s

A woman’s candid Reddit post about loneliness and lack of close friendships in her 30s has struck a chord with many Singaporeans online.

Woman in 30s seeking close friendships

In a post titled “Friendships in 30s – is this the way it will be?” on the r/askSingapore subreddit, the 37-year-old woman opened up about her yearning for deep, meaningful friendships, despite having a family of her own.

Now a full-time working mum with a toddler, the Redditor shared that she used to have a tight-knit group of friends in university.

Friendships in 30s – is this the way it will be?
byu/Auditor_1188 inaskSingapore

Sadly, she fell out with them due to a “series of childish incidents”. She has since struggled to form close bonds, even though she kept in touch with two secondary school friends.

However, differences in life stages — such as her secondary school friends being stay-at-home mums while she pursued her career — left her feeling “out of sync with them.”

Source: Ketut Subiyanto from Pexels on Canva. For illustration purposes only

While she acknowledged still being friends with them, she admitted:

I know I am not their no.1.

She wondered if her longing for a best friend was naive and whether she was simply not a “good friend” herself, especially since she was not there for her friends through their major milestones.

“Is it too late for me to find my best friend?” the original poster (OP) asked.

Netizens offer words of encouragement

Responding to the OP’s plea for “words of wisdom”, many netizens offered empathetic and encouraging comments.

One netizen shared that “there are seasons in life” — pointing out that different people accompany us through different stages of life.

Source: Reddit

Meanwhile, another Redditor felt that most people end up becoming besties with their spouses and simply sticking to their own family circle.

Source: Reddit

Another commenter explained that it is still possible to have a social life, but that it will probably involve a playdate rather than “partying or staying out late.”